Inserting the key into the keyhole was a daunting challenge, for my damp clothing made me shiver so badly, I struggled to keep my fingers from tap dancing. Also it has created a further more important urge – the urge to pee. Beyond the door further in the passage I hear the house-phone ringing. The key finally slips into the hole disengaging the lock. Finally gaining access I race across the hallway simultaneously trying to keep the injured toe in an upright position. I lift the receiver.
“Hello”
“Is this Mister McGregor?”
Trying to control a very determined bladder causes me to squirm knees bend – legs pressing tightly together.
“Yes it is can I help you?”
“My name is George Le Roux from All-Insure. I would like to offer you an upgrade on your current house-hold and vehicle insurance for a mere.....”
“Wait...hang on a minute. Can you call me back later?”
“When would be a more suitable time...?”
“Never mind I’ll call you!”
I replaced the receiver racing to the bathroom.
Twenty minutes later I climbed into a steaming bubble bath. The warmth returned to my body along with an appetite. Images of a forfeited steak lying between defrosted ice-cubes in the cooler-box on the backseat of the station wagon left me feeling vaguely disappointed. I made a mental schedule for the remainder of the day. The steak could still be oven-baked after I had taken the cell-phone in for repair. On the way home I could hire a few movies – stretch out on the couch and still enjoy a relaxing undisturbed afternoon. All was not doom and gloom I thought as I lay back between the bubbles. My eyelids lowered. It was so quiet.
The doorbell rings once, twice and yet again.
“No...no...no!”
The driveway gate - I had forgotten to close the damn gate. Somewhere alongside the house I hear Missy barking.
What must I do to get some peace around here?
I peep behind the front door.
“Hi....we are you new neighbours. This is my housemate Mitchell and I’m Jane.”
Suddenly I felt very exposed although I had a towel wrapped around my mid-waist.
“Hi” Mitchell greeted.
Both of them were dressed identically. Tight denim shorts pink tank tops with pink sandals.
Hello.....nice to meet you...”
I stopped talking. There was a nervous stutter lying somewhere in my throat and I didn’t want it to surface.
A few moments of awkward silence followed.
“We don’t want to appear forward but we have a small crisis next door. Our washing machine is leaking water somewhere at the back. Mitchell suggested we call my boyfriend to see if he can fix it but he’s not so handy with his hands”
Jane giggled.
“That’s not what I’ve heard....”
Jane glared at her girlfriend.
“Anyway we saw your car standing in the drive-way and thought since the kitchen floor is going to be flooded very soon we’ll take a chance and see if you can just pop over quickly and....”
I interrupted.
“Just let me throw on a tracksuit. I’ll be there in a few minutes”
To avoid feelings of guilt I searched for my misplaced toolbox in the garage. At least, anyone with doubts on my attentions would see that I was not sneaking across the front lawn to the neighbours, with dubious motives. Yet I could not shake the voices congregating in his conscience.
Are you so eager to lend a helping hand because you find the girls attractive Martin?
No. So they may be young and sort of good-looking but that’s not the reason.
Then why wasn’t your eyes focused on their faces? Why did they drift to the tight tops....to the slender tanned legs....?
I reasoned that it a result of male instincts. That it didn’t mean anything. I loved Angela. I’m a married man with children and no thoughts of infidelity.
What would she say if she knew you were alone with them?
She doesn’t need to know. I’ll walk in, do what I can to stop the washing machine from leaking, and walk out again. No harm done because it’s just another friendly neighbour showing an act of good faith.
I could not help noticing the bold colours of black, red and yellow decor as I stepped through the lounge. Wine glasses with a shade of beige lipstick smudges against the rims stood shadowed by a bottle of JC le Roux on a fire-engine red tiled coffee table. Black leather couches stood impressively against a yellow walled backdrop. Various frameless canvasses of African art lined the walls. I had to admit the girl’s focus drifted far from maternal and domestic matters.
“Your place is stunning. If you don’t mind me asking - what do you the two of you do for a living?
I enquired as I placed the tool box on the edge of the carpet just before the kitchen door.
“Some modeling...” Mitchell answered
“.....and a little bit of corporate socializing” Jane added with a subtle smile.
The tiled kitchen floor, as stated by them, was covered in a thin layer of soapy water. I had an idea where the water might have leaked from.
“We’ll need to mop up the floor first”
Mitchell and Jane smiled at each other. I could swear if I didn’t know better that they were reading each other’s minds. It was not the uncanny ability that bothered me much rather than the suggestion hidden beneath their smiles.
“Mopping is boring – let’s get wet....” Jane suggested.
“Two-piece?” Mitchell added.
Jane nodded in confirmation and while my mind was busy digesting the flowing suggestions they simultaneously disappeared into the bathroom. Moments later they reappeared, bath towel in hand, dressed in floral two piece bikinis.
In an instant they cast the towels on the wet surface of the kitchen tiles. Laughing Mitchell clambered hands and knees on the closer of the two towels. Jane decided to sit on the other towel dragging it across the floor by moving her hips. Their intentions were clear – to have fun while soaking up the wetness. They lifted the soaking towels, squeezing the moisture into an empty bucket, unperturbed by the misguided water.
Dumbfounded and red-faced, I watched in astonishment. Obviously they were merely having fun yet indirectly conscious of the effect imposed on the male watching from the doorway. For a few hesitant moments I considered walking away but chose to rather appear unfazed by their actions than to be seen as an insecure teenager with uncontrollable hormones.
The floor, gratefully I noticed, was drying up rapidly. Removing a pair of pliers and a flat-nosed screwdriver from the toolbox I edged across the floor toward the washing machine. Moving the machine slightly forward I watched from the corner of my eye as the two females bend over the open tub.
What are they up to now?
I thought as I squatted close to the outlet pipe at the bottom. As I had thought the clamp surrounding the pipe had simply loosened and merely needed to be replaced and tightened. Problem sorted.
“Are you sure they are yours?”
One of them giggled. I was unsure. One giggle was difficult to distinguish from another.
“Yes I bought three pairs of black last week specifically with the butterfly on the back strap”
What were they talking about?
“Then where are all my g-strings disappearing to?”
I decided that my presence was no longer of any importance and that I had perhaps seen and heard more than I should have. As I packed the tools back into the tool-box I heard the sound of a motor-bikes engine outside.
“Oh my God what’s Tommy doing here?
I heard Jane screech as they raced to the bedroom. I hear footsteps at the front-door. Some-one is knocking. Should I open the door? Mitchell runs from the bed-room dressed in a pair of shorts and a t-shirt.
“You’ll have to go through the back. Tommy is overly jealous and he has a bit of an inferior problem. Come on quick...quick!”
As I am jostled through the back door I hear the knocks on the front door intensify. I see Jane enter the hallway and stand in readiness to open the front door.
“There is a tree stump just behind the rose bushes close to the hole that you used to peep through. It’s high enough for you to clamber over with ease”
How did she know about the peeping? I thought as I scrambled across the perimeter of the swimming pool, with the toolbox, toward the prefab.
In South Africa today security plays a vital part in any business or private home. This book and the volumes to follow, will guide you step by step through the essential precautionary measures to be taken in protecting your family and valuables. From employing security guards, evacuation of your site and security measures to burglar bars and alarms in your private home.
a Book compiled by me from experience gained after 10 years in the security industry as Industrial relations officer with Nosa qualifications, 1st Aid, fire protection and also S.O.B. grade A.
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