Getting tired of this artistic pressure that I experience. It subtly manipulates me into an (allowed?) manifestation of thoughts on the papyrus scroll of the moment. It is as if I have no choice now, because I opened the door. Silly mistake, I wonder? Why does it have to take depression, darkness and the dredger of the soul to, debatably so- bring forth the best in us. I say debatably, since we do not know what the statistics are in terms of those who falter and perish along the way and those able to persist towards a moment of light and ‘balanced’ progression. Are we inherently and potentially inclined to such corruption, that this theory may find acceptance in a guiding norm that will protect us from our own devilish inertia? You know, Lord of the ages- those who camp on the atheistic side of the fence may say that the credit You would seek for that which you created, does not amount to much nor does it afford a worthwhile testimony. Humanity is overrated and by necessity then, each individual’s supposed ‘Via Dolorosa’.
I am reminded of the Black Widow spider. It is within this (one-sided) relationship where the male is devoured by the female after a (the one and only) mating session. What should this be called- sacrificial success? No greater love is there, than the person who sacrifices self for another. Will I be understood for calling it artistic pressure because it entails such romanticised nobleness!? Is this the circle of life? Repetitive cycles of brilliant moments- fed and driven by the spherical motion pictures of our (darkened) lives, to purge us towards purist levels of gratitude and spiritual politics. So, may I request a “get out of jail free” card? It is after all, part of life’s monopoly. The word ‘artistic’ should conjure up images of tranquility, warm colours, exquisite fragrance and wow moments, yet…if I requested such relieve aid in accordance with this defined or perceived observation, will there be answers and subsequent rest for my soul? Am I seemingly discounting the value of a gift- an ability to translate universal struggles into hopefully- understandable jargon? Since my person, my narrative, my pain and journey culminate in the character of my unique representation, is it possible that I will be prone to the inertia mentioned earlier? Have I already grown used to something that others may experience as insightful or awesome? Or am I seeking some level of escape from something that, at times, will be ‘soul consuming’? How can I keep filling blank pages and not receive? How can I give and not find some level of replenishment? Is this the ironic artistic angle of my revelatory arrival- that you will forever remain beyond touch- like the hound and the hare?
Yet, my narrative in combination with my blue print, has taken me to this grid reference in time space and I do not know if I despise or appreciate the pained creativity through which I have no choice or option but to birth these words, because nothing can change the set term of carry: more and more and more…just when I anticipate a final emptying of this reservoir, this thesaurus of words simply multiplies, creates more momentum and spews forth- more and more and more…yet, where is the justifiable rest? Where are the fields of gold? Where is peace? And where is contentment? Where is the suspended animation for the inner man- where the loudest noise may be the movement of nothing? Where is the fulfilling of this desire?
Does the above depend on you, my lady? Is it possible that answers will come to these questions of tectonic proportions? Does this theory reflect the sensitivity and micro margins of compatibility and relationship, without elevating it to divine status? For sure, we need to realize that we are only human! Scary contemplations these are, but even infinitely worse if it were to be true and your presence is manifested by the absence thereof! Artistic choice?! Oh, so contradictory- this death in beauty, these dark rays of sunshine, snow so cold- yet it burns the skin. I wish release could come through the simplified strokes of a spiritual painter’s brush- to replace the colours that represent and complement the current stillbirth. If only so easy, if only…yet, in breakthrough joy, we must believe!
In South Africa today security plays a vital part in any business or private home. This book and the volumes to follow, will guide you step by step through the essential precautionary measures to be taken in protecting your family and valuables. From employing security guards, evacuation of your site and security measures to burglar bars and alarms in your private home.
a Book compiled by me from experience gained after 10 years in the security industry as Industrial relations officer with Nosa qualifications, 1st Aid, fire protection and also S.O.B. grade A.
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