*It’s a shame stupidity isn’t painful.
*I think, therefore, we have nothing in common.
*Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he merely gargled.
*Somewhere a village is missing its idiot.
*If ignorance is bliss, why aren’t more people happy?
*It may be that your sole purpose in life is to serve as a bad example to others.
*Don’t judge me based on your ignorance!
*Why are there five syllables in the word ‘Monosyllable?’
*If swimming is good for the figure, explain the whale!
*Imagination is the best weapon in the war against reality!
*Outside a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside a dog it’s too dark to read.
*Where there’s a will I want to be in it!
*I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person!
*It’s love and not time that heals all wounds.
*Don’t hate yourself in the morning, sleep until lunchtime!
*Life is short make fun of it!
*I’m multi-talented; I can talk and irritate people at the same time!
*It’s better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you’re not!
*A truly wise person never plays leapfrog with a unicorn!
*Fat people are hard to kidnap!
*The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, that’s because the average man can see better that what he can think!
*Save the Whale – Harpoon a fat chick!
The Truth on Alcohol Consumption
Alcohol makes you think you’re whispering when you’re not!
It causes you to tell your friends over and over that you love them.
Alcohol may make you think that people are laughing with you and not at you.
It may cause you to think that you can sing.
It could also make you think that you can talk to people without spitting.
Alcohol may create the illusion that you are cleverer, tougher and better looking than most people.
Too much alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your underwear!
In South Africa today security plays a vital part in any business or private home. This book and the volumes to follow, will guide you step by step through the essential precautionary measures to be taken in protecting your family and valuables. From employing security guards, evacuation of your site and security measures to burglar bars and alarms in your private home.
a Book compiled by me from experience gained after 10 years in the security industry as Industrial relations officer with Nosa qualifications, 1st Aid, fire protection and also S.O.B. grade A.
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